the crazed artist
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Thursday, September 16, 2004
tis very amusing...
20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with That.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Sexual Favors"
7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Don't Use Any Punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Hard.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......
20. Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile..Its Called Therapy...
*tears in eyes from laughter* tis so bloody awesome...stole from some persons website...
iamcrazed
(sanity is so over rated...)
Current mood:  crazy
Tuesday, September 7, 2004
whoa...
its been forever since I updated this thing...
just wanted to put up my AWESOME schedule for this year...
Day A
P1 Art and design 10IB (Harrigan)
P2 Science 10IB (Cooper YAY!!!!)
lunch
P3 English 10IB(Howe)
P4 Band 10IB (Brenan*falls over and dies*)
Day B
P1 Social studies 10IB (Johnson YAY!!!)
P2 Science 10IB (Cooper double YAY!!!!)
lunch
P3 Math 10 Pure IB(*whimper*)
P4 Applied Graphic arts (deBourcier (best class EVER))
anyways, I am really looking forward to this year...
since its been so long, this will be a long update, mainly because I found some sweet and amusing things on some website...
This is sweet...
LOVE MEANS:
A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on the road...
Girl: Slow down. Im scared.
Guy: No this is fun.
Girl: No its not please, its too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
*Girl hugs him*
Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on? Its bugging me.
Paper the next day: motorcycle crashed into a building because brake failure. 2 people riding only 1 survived.
The truth: halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes broke, he didnt want 2 let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved him & felt her hug 1 last time, then had her wear his helmet so that she would live even though it meant that he would die.
For all of you with teenagers or who have had teenagers, or are a teenager, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats:
1 - Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.
2 - No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.
3 - You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.
4 - Even if you tell jokes as well as Jay Leno, neither your cat nor your teen will ever crack a smile.
5 - No cat or teenager shares you taste in music.
6 - Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.
7 - Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.
8 - Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating that ultimate human ecstasy -- a sense of complete and utter boredom.
9 - Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone's furniture.
10 - Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior.
Thus, if you must raise teenagers, the best sources of advice are not other parents, but veterinarians. It is also a good idea to keep a guidebook on cats at hand at all times. And remember, above all else, put out the food and do not make any sudden moves in their direction. When they make up their minds, they will finally come to you for some affection and comfort, and it will be a triumphant moment for all concerned
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg!
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht
oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist
and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you
can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not
raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh?
anyways, just some random amusing things...get new sketchbooks tommorrow...I've been waiting 3 bloody years to get those things...YaY*dances*...
ciao
iamcrazed
dead
(those who hear not the music, think the dancer's mad...)
Current mood:  artistic
Saturday, July 24, 2004
...
my artistic side is very confused...I have no idea what to do...there are too many styles and I have no idea which one I should master...abstract, wildlife, landscape, anime, people(realistic), symbolism, fantasy...so my new goal is...
WORK ON THEM ALL!!!!!
(tis all good...besides, when I went to the Art Walk on Whyte Ave, I found that most of the artists who were painting incredibly realistic people had started with cartoons and anime is a kind of cartoon isn't it...though I will be sure to steer clear of traditional anime...*huge...eyes...twitch*)
Went and slept over at Clair's (not Clair from Vic, different Clair...she's actually on LJ at vampirecloud...)...watched Yami no Matsuei(Descendants of Darkness) which has become my most favorite anime ever!!!...with the most evil antagonist ever...he should burn burn BURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
though the theme song kind of scared me...and me and Clair knew almost all the voice actors from different animes...also watched Record of Loddoss Wars, which was ok, but the subtitles were terrible (not overdubbed...I think the subtitles were in some kind of primitive english)...also finished reading Chobits, which was incredible...
Managed to reincarnate my muse and draw again...a smallswirly wing...but its a start...
Good god what is wrong with me? Since the translated version of Yami no Matsuei is not available in Canada(yet), I downloaded the first book...and I almost cried while reading it...almost...(most of you no that I have never ever cried from readinga book or watching a movie)...of all things that...my mind is so strange I do not even dare to try and figure out the complications of it...well, I off to contemplate this...will be gone from the 25th to the 31st...
ciao...
iamcrazed
("I see." Said the blind man to the deaf man...)
Current mood:  contemplative
Sunday, July 18, 2004
my dad almost scared the hell out of me just now...
since the window is open and the computer is upstairs...
I'm sitting here typing when this really strange voice comes out of (apparent) nowhere...and there is no one outside the door...severely freaked out, I sit back down and I hear it again...my heart rate jumps up a mile...
and then I see the faint outline of my dads face outside the window...
heart is still racing...
iamcrazed
Current mood: shocked
...
minor flood last sunday...
or at least, minor in some minds...huge hailstorm with hail the size of dollar coins start falling from the sky...usually these hail storms last about 10 mins...
this one lasted for 45...
basically, our basement started to flood(water was pouring in through the windows)...and our computer was downstairs...so we all run downstairs and try to save whatever we can, or at least get everything to higher ground...
the water ended up raising to around one foot...
why?
because there was so much water that the storm drains overflowed,so instead of the water going out through the drains, more water started coming in...
I thought we had it bad...in other places throughout the city, the water in the streets was so high, cars were starting to float away slightly(no exaggeration)...
so our screen got wrecked and the scanner is not agreeing with my new monitor, so I'll have to borrow someone elses until it works again, so I will still update...very soon actually...
so I haven't been able to get on the computer for a week...or see anyone due to the fact that I have to supervise my little sister night and day...I HAVEN"T EVEN DRAWN ANYTHING!!!!!
not that it would matter becuase I have no scanner...
anyways, hope all of you are having a great summer...
friends, if you haven't emailed me yet EMAIL ME!!!
I WANT TO TALK TO PEOPLE!!!!
iamcrazed
p.s.I will be participating in the Art Walk on Whyte Ave next year...am very excited...though must build up large portfolio very fast...that can't be good...
Current mood: indifferent
Friday, July 9, 2004
ok, yesterday I went grocery shopping with my mom at superstore around 9:30 pm...when we went up to the cashier to pay, I happened to glance at the guy at the till...AND HE LOOKED LIKE A VAMPIRE!!!(pointy teeth and all)...tried not to stare and walked away as fast as possible...then when I got outside...THE CLOUDS HAD THIS DARK REDDISH HUE THAT CLOSELY RESEMBLED BLOOD!!!!!! so freaked out at this point...then I find out there's a tornado warning!
OMG THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END!!!!
iamcrazed
Current mood:  distressed
Monday, July 5, 2004
ok,
I'm just watching a random movie and at this scene of a carnival guess what song is playing in the background?!!?!?!?
'CARAVAN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(only band people will understand the terror...)
anyhow,
went yesterday with Loie to see Fahrenheit 9/11...twas incredibly...shocking...and well put together...I mean, after all these scenes of bombs being dropped on Iraq, the corpses being piled onto trucks, gruesome shots of children's dead bodies, they flash to an interview of Britney Spears saying that "We should trust our President because he's always right even though he's a bastard "(so the last part wasn't in there BUT ITS TRUE!!!)everyone should go see that movie...especially all the Americans...
now I'm terribly inspired to write or draw or something, but just can't bring myself to do it...tis quite odd...oh well...
exam week was surprisingly fun for me, despite the fact that I almost died of boredom during the hour and a half I waited for the teachers to let us go...there is no way it took everyone 2 hours to complete the LA exam...ah well, happy because I can get into all the courses I wanted to next year...spend all the afternoons that week hanging around at City Centre with Autumn and anyone else who happened to have shown up...hung out with Emy on Friday...we've grown surprisingly distant and twas nice to talk to her again...can't believe I told her who I had a crush on...what the hell was going through my mind?*sigh*oh well,at least she promised not to tell anyone...must go attempt to draw and bring up a brief storyline for a webcomic I'm thinking of creating...hope to see you all soon...have a great summer...
and don't die of boredom...
iamcrazed
(Barney rapping...
my eyes...they burn...)
Current mood: creative
Sunday, June 27, 2004
ok...
I'm seriously worried about some of my friends...
they're all sad and depressed about something or other...or something else is bothering them that they're not telling me about...WHY DOES NO ONE TELL ME?!?! I can't really help anyone if they don't tell me what's wrong...
then another one of my friends has been backstabbing my other friends and I have no idea what to do about it...
I'm suspiscious that one of my friends has an eating disorder but don't know what to do about that either...
then another one of my friends is having as feud with another one of my friends and I'm stuck in the middle...
some of my friends are slowly drifting away...
others insist on infatuating themselves with my art and constantly steal my sketchbook...or begin to copy my stuff...
sometimes, tis annoying to be the person nobody hates...
iamcrazed
(if you need the light, why walk alone in the dark?)
Current mood:  stressed
Tuesday, June 22, 2004
*twitch*
ok...the french exam was the worst exam I have ever written in my life...it was one of those exams where every single goddamned answer would work for the question...besides the fact that my stupid teacher hadn't taught me half the stuff that was on the goddamned thing...I am sure i failed it, just because of the fact that the questions could not have been written any worse...
but i had fun afterwards...started drawing a pic of a death pheonix (I was in a very mrbid mood after that...that...THING!!!) then we went to ESSO and Amelia bought me, Autumn and Jeanette ice cappucinos...then me, amelia and Autumn went and hung out around City Centre(tis so amusing to watch Autumn go sock shopping)...then we went to the library to attempt to figure out how to get onto the internet...turns out you need a library card, which none of us had, so we sat around, and I worked on my pic some more while Amelia taught Autumn the entire Russia unit...then we went and ate and I bought everyone icecream just because I felt like it...except there was this seurity guard staring at us while we ate it and twas really creepy...Autumn is incredibly paranoid...other than that, Math exam tommorrow and there is no way it can be worse than the one I wrote today...
see you all tomorrow...
iamcrazed
(leninleninleninleninleninleninleninlenin marx marx lenin lenin...)
Current mood: mellow
Sunday, June 20, 2004
oh...my...god...
SCHOOL"S OVER!!!
I can't believe it, this year went by way too fast and now Loie is leaving (going to miss her so much) and Emy is leaving (going to miss her too). If you get a chance, go look at this...
http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com
tis unbelievably amusing...
today was the best day ever...I swear I live for the last day of school...we did nothing in french(as usual)...then in science we played cards for half the class and Cooper gave us icecream sandwiches(which were quite good)...then we went outside to the playground to play tag and Autumn tackled Chris...if only Loie had been there, she would have laughed so hard...in gym, Pearcy bought us all slurpy's and we enjoyed a lovely class of watching the most insane dodgeball game I have ever seen...in social we had a mini quiz and then we went outside and played frisbee for the rest of the class...
and grade 9 grad was the best ever...
ceremony=crap
sure the performers were quite good, but Neitch's speech (sickeningly fake and insencere) and the MC's( ishall not say anything)...twas very very sad...
but dinner was good...and the dance was awesome...great DJ, wonderful songs, and no one knowing what the hell they were doing...that was unbelievably fun...though Jessie(Amelia's "boyfriend") really creeped me out...the entire time he stared and me, Autumn and Mary (good sign or bad, I do not know) and he danced with Autumn and Mary (thank god there wasn't another slow song before he had to leave)...but Autumn then shoved me into dancing with Chris, which wasn't all that bad(Loie said we made a cute couple) but then he switched me with Lanna so I ended up dancing with Brad, which wasn't all that bad either...was still sooooo much FUN!!! I want to do that again every single year...
anyways people, I shall miss you all. Some I will see next year, others, we'd better stay in touch...
have a great summer everyone and attempt to survive provincials...
iamcrazed
(kangaroos eat sheep)
Current mood: ecstatic
Wednesday, June 2, 2004
*grin*
Your aura shines Orange!
What Color Is Your Aura?
brought to you by Quizilla
so so me...
anywho, had such a great day today...laughed alot with everyone...felt way too much like a friday...and art inspired me to relly get over my phobia of drawing people and try more realistic instead of anime...the art blew me away...so incredibly GOOD!!!
And after school, me and Loie went to WEM to look for a grad dress for me...we looked for the store for half an hour before finally finding it...and when we found it, we realized we had passed it three times...but I got my grad dress and I REALLY like it (and thank you ever so much for finding it for me Loie*hug*)...now to find some shoes...
must go attempt to draw people...
cya
iamcrazed
("Look, the "Christian Marketplace""
"No wonder its empty...")
Current mood:  bouncy
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
*twitch*
AAARRGH!!!!
http://www.congress.org/congressorg/issues/alert/?alertid=5834001&content_dir=ua_congressorg
"$28 million has been added to the 2004 Selective Service System (SSS) budget to prepare for a military draft that could start as early as June 15, 2005."
"...provide for the common defense by requiring that all young persons [age 18--26] in the United States, including women, perform a period of military service or a period of civilian service in furtherance of the national defense and homeland security, and for other purposes."
"Dodging the draft will be more difficult than those from the Vietnam era. College and Canada will not be options."
"This plan, among other things, eliminates higher education as a shelter and includes women in the draft. "
Son of a...!
Bush is so out of office.
PLEASE GET THE WORD OUT!!
Thanks,
taken from dhio's livejournal...
stupid stupid stupid!!!!!!
I'm mad now...
iamcrazed
("Are you listening to me?!?!"
"Of course, I always listen to advice with my ears covered...")
Current mood: pissed off
Friday, May 21, 2004
3:20PM
heyho...
Instructions:
1. Copy and paste this: [font color=thecrazedartist][b]thecrazedartist[/b][/font]into your journal.
2. Replace my username with yours.
3. Replace [] with <>.
thecrazedartist
Loie if you read this, stop being sad. Don't worry be happy. World isn't happy when you're sad and no one should cry that much over anything...and always remember...
electwomagnetic wadiation
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
10:15PM
so the image thing didn't work...I'm not all that great with html...so lets try some other things...
<img:http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/photo/4436_1085012835.jpg>
10:10PM
ok...
I would just like to say
THANK YOU EVER SO MUCH LEKK!!!
you saved my life, and I will be at school tomorrow...
as for all my other friends...
I am deeply dissapointed in you for not telling me that there was an achievement exam tomorrow that we can't rewrite...
*shakes head* so dissapointed...
and lookie...
<img:http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/photo/4436_1085012835.jpg>
someone I talk to on Elftown drew this for me...while no one else has even emailed me or shown any concern whatsoever (except for goodness_sake and lekk, thanks again)
once again, ever so dissapointed...
iamcrazed
(yes...but is it art?...)
Current mood:  disappointed
argh...
my jaw continually aches and I can't smile or laugh or anything (which is incredibly hard for me) and there is nothing good on the fridge that I can EAT!!! so hungry...and slowly dying of boredom...the icepack has become my best friend, since no one else has helped me at all *glares at friends* except for lekk and goodness_sake...you made me feel slightly better...*sigh* miss you all and daytime tv sucks...
i will survive
iamcrazed
Current mood: pessimistic
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
...
7:45 am
"Ashley, get up!"
lie in bed, get gradually more nervous.
get up
get dressed
sit in sofa chair, trying not to think
can't eat or drink yet...
8:30 am
arrive at oral surgeon place
sit in waiting room for a while
get increasingly freaked out
(person at desk)"Ashley Mackenzie"
hug dad
enter room
(btw at this point I was noticing odd things...for example, the doors didn't have handles and were made of a reddish wood...)
8:45 am
sit in chair in the middle of the room
looks uncomfortably like one of the places where they do experiments on people in sci-fi movies
twiddle with bracelet (on which is the bead with an ankh...thanks ever so much Autumn)
doctor enters *insert dramatic music here*
anesthetic needle in hand
lie there
everything goes out of focus and there's this strange taste at the back of my mouth (metallic kinda)
close eyes
(actually, the precise time i went out was 8:49...there was this big digital clock on the wall...)
10:15 am
(before anything else, apparently you do dream when your put to sleep, because I remember dreaming and it had something to do with Autumn...but I'm terrible at remembering dreams so can't remember specifics)
wake up in different place on bed thing
can't feel half my face(even my ear) from severe freezing
nurse people take me to bench (extreme dizziness ensues)
give me ginger ale(was only supposed to have 2 cups, but do you know how good it tastes when you haven't eaten or drank anything in forever and just got over uncountable hours of worrying?)
nurse person talks to us (yes there were other people there too, someone for wisdom teeth and others for who knows what)
turns out I can't eat really solid food for two weeks...or at least solid food that I need to bite with my front teeth...
dad comes and I can leave
whee, my day of supposed torture...still can't feel half of my face, but I can feel my ear again...been eating soup all day (french onion...so good...) and having icecream tonight...supposed to be in much pain tommorrow and have 3 different types of painkillers...and getting depressed because NONE of my friends emailed me...
nobody loves me
iamcrazed
("A grasshopper is a type of bug" words of wisdom from my 4 year old sister)
Current mood:  indescribable
Saturday, May 15, 2004
...
ok...
this week has been interesting but quite annying all the same...
track meet was great fun, even though I didn't win anything...and Mary stole my sketchbook AGAIN!!!
Adam (otherwise known as Fadam(sp?)) crashed right into me in gym and didn't even say anything! what am I? invisible?!
frantic scurrying to complete homework...then I don't even hand it in...
Ms. Knoll reads a short story...a short story which might have been half decent if she wasn't reading it to us...what does she think we are? idiots? I hate having people read me things...especially her because her voice is soooo annoying!
my mom calls at lunch...shes taking me to the chinese doctor after school because I have some cracks in my tongue*insert dramatic music here*...so I go...turns out I have terrible digestion and am completely out of balance (I will only belive them when they show a person who is perfectly in balance)...so now I have to drink this disgusting tea (not nearly as bad as wheatgrass juice though...) twice a day...and do you know what one of the ingredients is?:
chicken's gizzard skin (stir-fried)
...why me?...
iamcrazed
p.s. and I'm also missing the only decent series of art classes all year...
(Guns, ammo and picnic supplies ~seen somewhere on a store sign in the US)
Current mood: aggravated
Saturday, May 8, 2004
hey...
for some strange reason, I felt like looking around for different kinds of phobias...some are quite amusing...have some...
Eyes- Ommatophobia
Knees- Genuphobia
Chickens- Alektorophobia
Being Touched- Hphephobia
Colour- Chromatophobia
Pleasure- Hedonophobia
Sleep- Hypnophobia
Thinking- Phronemophobia
Money- Chrometophobia
Lawyers- Attorneyphobia
Heaven- Ouranophobia
Eating- Phagophobia
Food- Sitophobia
The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth- Arachibutyrophobia
Dust- Amathophobia
Everything- Pantophobia
Fears- Phobophobia
Imperfection- Atelophobia
Music- Musicophobia
Names- Nomatophobia
New Things- Neophobia
Walking- Basiphobia
Being Looked at- Scopophobia
School- Scholiophobia
Clouds- Nephophobia
Long Words ~ Sesquipedalophobia
Knowledge~ Gnosiophobia or Epistemophobia
Names~ Nomatophobia
Laughter~ Geliophobia
Flutes~ Aulophobia
tis all great...wait...have more...
Aerophobia- Fear of swallowing air
Anthrophobia- Fear of flowers
Bibliophobia- Fear of books
Barophobia- Fear of gravity
Cathisophobia- Fear of sitting
Chaetophobia- Fear of hair
Chionophobia- Fear of snow
Chronophobia- Fear of time
Deciophobia- Fear of making decisions
Dendrophobia- Fear of trees
Eleutherophobia- Fear of freedom
Geniophobia- Fear of chins
Graphophobia- Fear of writing
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words
Lachanophobia- Fear of vegetables
Logophobia- Fear of words
Mnemophobia- Fear of memories
Ophthalmophobia- Fear of opening one’s eyes
Papyrophobia- Fear of paper
Sciophobia- Fear of shadows
Sophophobia- Fear of learning
that will keep me amused for a very long time...
anywho...
am starting to get a cold...hope it goes away soon...
tratii
iamcrazed
(You don't have to torture yourself, life will do it for you...)
Current mood: amused
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